Ever felt like everyone you ever loved is disappointed in you? You try your best to see to it that everyone is happy with the role you play in their lives, but fail to do so. What's even worse, is that, no one ever tries to recognise the effort you put in to make them happy. I don't mean to start this blog with negativity lurking in my heart...but it is situations like these that make us pour out our feelings in some way or the other.
I'm a regular 15 year old with her own set of problems, like each one of you who is of around my age or has ever been. Everyone reading this knows how "not easy" it is dealing with parents at this point in life... They want to protect you but at the same time want you to become responsible. During this time you might feel like they always want you to do what they want you to do...not just parents, for that matter, anyone you know tries to make your life work their way. The question remains - whom should you listen to? Everybody seems so right when explaining their theory of life! It's almost as difficult as deciding what career should I chose in life.
In the past few days, I've been through a lot of 'cheesy teenage drama'... If that's not enough, I'm gonna start going to college very soon and the pressure I'm facing to get into a good college is tremendous. I've realised that my struggle in life begins now. I want to take charge of and be responsible for my mental, physical and social well being, but, I also wanna become that little girl I used to be...the girl who was never doubted for whatever she was about to do...the girl who was so free of worry and who was a star in her world! The world is a cruel place...it keeps pressurising you till you start feeling like a pressure cooker, waiting to release that steam...and when the steam jets out, so many people get burnt or scalded unintentionally.
I'm about to turn 16 in three days...I should think of this as a new beginning, a new opportunity to prove myself...'prove'...ever thought about how much this word makes us suffer? What have we to prove to the world? To the society? To every person related to us? Moreover, why prove when you can go on without giving a crap? Now, because I've to keep proving myself and my strength and my ability to handle my life, I'm not able to do what I feel like. It's unfair how the life that's given to us is under the authoritarian rule of the society...Can't change it, can we? So, even though I'm about to complete 16 years of life, the unpleasant happenings I faced in the 15th year are gonna tag along with me for the rest of my life. Even if I don't want to remember any of it, it is always the people around me that will remind me and keep pushing me to do things whether or not it is achievable.
I'm a regular 15 year old with her own set of problems, like each one of you who is of around my age or has ever been. Everyone reading this knows how "not easy" it is dealing with parents at this point in life... They want to protect you but at the same time want you to become responsible. During this time you might feel like they always want you to do what they want you to do...not just parents, for that matter, anyone you know tries to make your life work their way. The question remains - whom should you listen to? Everybody seems so right when explaining their theory of life! It's almost as difficult as deciding what career should I chose in life.
In the past few days, I've been through a lot of 'cheesy teenage drama'... If that's not enough, I'm gonna start going to college very soon and the pressure I'm facing to get into a good college is tremendous. I've realised that my struggle in life begins now. I want to take charge of and be responsible for my mental, physical and social well being, but, I also wanna become that little girl I used to be...the girl who was never doubted for whatever she was about to do...the girl who was so free of worry and who was a star in her world! The world is a cruel place...it keeps pressurising you till you start feeling like a pressure cooker, waiting to release that steam...and when the steam jets out, so many people get burnt or scalded unintentionally.
I'm about to turn 16 in three days...I should think of this as a new beginning, a new opportunity to prove myself...'prove'...ever thought about how much this word makes us suffer? What have we to prove to the world? To the society? To every person related to us? Moreover, why prove when you can go on without giving a crap? Now, because I've to keep proving myself and my strength and my ability to handle my life, I'm not able to do what I feel like. It's unfair how the life that's given to us is under the authoritarian rule of the society...Can't change it, can we? So, even though I'm about to complete 16 years of life, the unpleasant happenings I faced in the 15th year are gonna tag along with me for the rest of my life. Even if I don't want to remember any of it, it is always the people around me that will remind me and keep pushing me to do things whether or not it is achievable.
No comments:
Post a Comment